MenopauseMenu guest blog post by Cheryl B. Lamin, PhD, Licensed Psychologist.
I was 22, studying with my research group and then, out of the blue, Pattie started turning red. Undressing, she chuckled “here you go, hot flash in action”. Coat, sweater, and t-shirt piled by her lap, she continued in her bra-less tank top. Dumbfounded, I wasn’t sure what to make of it, and wondered if she was crazy. Trying to imagine my future self in the same situation, I doubted I’d be as self assured and composed.
Fast forward.
The first time the heat emanated from my own core and slowly made its way through my body, I noticed my mind saying “oh, this is what Pattie was talking about, this is what it feels like to have a hot flash!” Instead of “crazy,” she had become my guiding light. Her confidence in the face of aging led me towards self-compassion instead of struggle.
Breathing through the discomfort and making space, I recognized the gift of responding with kindness and “riding the wave.” By following a few easy steps, you too will ride the wave.
Step 1: Imagine the hot flash
During a neutral time of your choosing, bring the image of yourself while the flash is just starting, where you feel it in your body, the temperature, your feelings and thoughts. Make the image as vivid and all-consuming as possible. Hold that image.
Step 2: Slow rhythm breathing
Activate your soothing parasympathetic nervous system:
- Count 4: Inhale through your nose
- Count 2: Hold
- Count 6: Exhale through your mouth
Step 3: Waves on the beach
- Inhale, imagine the waves on the beach coming up to the shore
- Hold, imagine the wave cresting and bubbling up
- Exhale, imagine the wave retreating back into the ocean
Repeat this sequence as many times as is comfortable. This will create a new response pattern that will be easier to activate during an actual hot flash.
We can’t control the ocean but we can ride the waves.
Dr. Cheryl Lamin